More Air America
Everyone should be listening to this. All you need is realplayer and you can listen all day long at work, to Al Franken on 'The O'Franken Factor.' Then you can go home (or still be at work like me) and listen to Janeane Garofalo at 8. And you don't even need a radio. You just have to click the link.

Listen to Air America Radio Here.
- posted by liz @ 3/31/2004 02:28:00 PM 0 comments

 
Apartment SHARE Available !!
Virtual apartment hunting is my new favorite pastime, second only to virtual shoe shopping. But seriously, this makes me want to vomit. Think that counts as a "special skill"?

"I'm a single professional male. I'm looking for a short term roommate 1-4 months with the possibility of a longer term which will depend upon our arrangement.I want an extremely (down for whatever) friendly single female roommate to share my Manhattan apartment.
24 hour doorman, safe neighborhood, close to transportation and stores.
You must be extremely friendly and you should possess special skills such as light cooking etc... Rent will be reduced based upon your special skills.
You don't have to be a model or movie star but you must look clean.
Since this is a nice building image is important, thus Email a picture of yourself with your contact number. "

As a friend just pointed out, this guy should quit to the chase and just get a mail order bride. Ew, I'm so grossed out right now.

Apartment SHARE Available !! [via Craigslist]
- posted by liz @ 3/30/2004 10:06:00 AM 0 comments

 
Air America Radio
TAKE NOTICE!

"On March 31, 2004 Air America Radio begins airlifting entertaining, progressive talk radio to millions of Americans who for far too long have been and are being neglected by talk radio broadcasters today.

Our on-air personalities and guests represent today's top political and popular humorists, commentators, activists and analysts.

Our irreverent, informative programming sparks the kind of challenging political and social dialogue that has been absent from AM radio for years.

Our programs will mix provocative conversation, challenging interviews and biting political satire."

Yeah. This is awesome.

Janeane Garofalo is hosting "The Majority Report" from 8PM-11PM.
And I am going to become a complete loser who hangs out at home and listens to the radio every night. Nice.

Air America Radio
- posted by liz @ 3/29/2004 06:45:00 PM 0 comments

 
Direct to you, via craigslist, via m.f. I can't add anything, I can't edit anything, just read this please.
"Four Free Dogs, One Monkee

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Reply to: anon-27376030@craigslist.org
Date: 2004-03-26, 12:46AM EST


I have four free dogs. Two of them are large sized, about up to my waist. One is brown and the other sort of milky grey, with a large black patch of hair on his belly. The "black hair patch" dog has a limp, as it was stepped on by a truck driver doing a delivery one day. But he's very kind. The other two dogs are about the size of a bowling ball, but not round like that. One is more round and the other pretty skinny. I don't know the breeds, but they have scratchy hair. You may have seen me with them because I walk them all together usually from Lexington to Central Park and I like to go down 80th street. I also have a monkey but he looks sort of sick. I think you'd need a vet for him. I got him in New Jersey about three years ago. All of these are free and I have individual bowls for the dog and a leash for the monkey. I have to get rid of them because I need an operation in a week that's pretty serious and I don't have anywhere for them to stay. They all get along great except for the monkey and the larger small dog. But I'd hate to spilt them up. Serious inquiries only. I would rather that they didn't go to the Bronx or Staten Island. Nothing personal.


it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
this is in or around Upper East Side"

Four Free Dogs, One Monkee [via Craigslist]



- posted by liz @ 3/26/2004 02:14:00 PM 0 comments

 
meat-filled diners
Shecky's describes Carvao Churrascaria, Bar, Lounge & Grill as having "meat filled diners." HAhahaha. There are just so many "that's what she said" jokes and so little time. Regardless. I would like to be meat filled. Take that as you will.

Instead, tonight I voyage into the living nightmare that is mid-town for some RED LOBSTER action. I LOVE IT!
- posted by liz @ 3/25/2004 05:20:00 PM 0 comments

 
Today's microcosmic special feature. Though I may be making up words.
And does it make me incredibly shallow that my latest prayer was to know what the deal is with the new Asian-looking restaurant on 4th and B is? Perhaps. Today my wish has been granted. Lockhartsteele comes through once again. This place is next to my bus stop and a block away from my humble abode and thank god, as I needed yet another place from which to purchase the Chinese food that has plagued my mind and stomach for the last month. I LOVE it when New York seems really tiny and incestuous. Like we're all jammed in here together to share some sort of secret dirty joke. I see a new restaurant opening and I know I'll be able to find out about it with a single click on my 'favorites' tab. Not to mention that in NYC you can eat dinner next to random 'celebrities' on a fairly frequent basis in the cheapest of eating establishments. Oh, even more bizarre, I'm standing at the corner of Houston and Broadway today, running completely random errand that is nowhere near my actual place of employment, and my roommate walks up to me from behind and says hi. And it's not like she works near there either. So weird. So tiny. Hmph.

Review: No. 1 Chinese [via Lockhartsteele]
- posted by liz @ 3/24/2004 06:06:00 PM 0 comments

 
Begging to differ.
This one's a day late or so, but I figure with my excessive recent slacking, it doesn't really matter anymore anyway. So Maccers offers up this list of observations about why it's so bloody nice and special and wonderful to have been not-hungover at work for the past three days. Well screw you. I'm still messy as all hell right now and it's past 11AM. I'm bitter. Happy to be leaving work early, unhappy to be taking the "China Town Express" to Boston (unhappy on so many levels). Tired after a horrendously interrupted 4 hours of half-sleep, hungover and partied out to a obscene degree. I'm going to get on the bus and read about Duchamp because that's what is currently making somewhat comfortable and self-satisfied. Anyway. I felt the need to reinvent this bullshit.

So the Maccers list goes something like this. I omitted the cheery, uplifting and completely unnecessary commentary.

"1. I am good at my job....
2. I like my job....
3. I am efficient...
4. Both my apartment and my office is tidy...
5. I am craving for fruit...
6. I want to exercise for exercise's sake...
7. I am fantasizing about playing tennis. And being dead good at it, obviously....
8. I feel healthy and awake, and dare I say it, perky...."

Well fuck. you. Repeat after me:

1. I am not particularly good at my job and I don't like what I do with 76% of the day. And though I make just barely enough to pay the rent, is 1/2 of a bedroom on Avenue C worth a deteriorating sex life caused by constant preoccupation with aforementioned job's suckier qualities?

2. see previous

3. I am so not even anywhere near efficient. I'm not actually quite sure what that means.

4. I'm currently staring into yesterday's empty soup can, from lunch. Still on my desk. Should probably save as could be used as ashtray...mmm...

5. I am craving a cigarette. And Spicy Hot V8. And my 4th vendor bagel of the day. Go fatty go.

6. I never want to move again. I wish I could be teleported to Canal St. for the bus. Maybe they'll come pick me up...should probably look into that.

7. I am fantasizing about fantasizing without interruptions by horrid, horrid work, and increasingly horrid hangover. And a bagel.

8. I feel tired, groggy, in need of artificial and/or potentially illegal sources of stimulants and/or a 76 hour nap in a really, really large bed, that is not my own, obviously...


There, that's better.

This is the third day I have not been hungover at work. I have made the following observations [via Maccers]
- posted by liz @ 3/19/2004 11:41:00 AM 0 comments

 
I'm not dead, dammit! You wish, you bastard.
I'm just busy! I haven't updated ANY thing. Including my goddamn agenda book. I mean seriously, EVERYONE should be at work for 12 hours a day. It's GREAT! But seriously, if you do get a spare moment that you don't use to smoke an f.a.g. (I know), and you don't make overtime (and if you do, I hate you, never come here again), take your yearly salary, divide it by 365, then the number of hours you're actually working per day, and find out how much you're REALLY making before taxes! HA! phenomenal. I'm just pushing 7 myself. THAT'S not minimum wage! I'm going to protest. By doing what, I'm just not quite sure. Until then, I'll relish in the fact that the latest bane of my existence is over, officially, today. Blech.
- posted by liz @ 3/15/2004 07:53:00 PM 0 comments